I've always been told that I'm a smart girl, and I've always enjoyed learning. From the time I was a
toddler in day care I've enjoyed reading, writing, and just learning. However, I can honestly say that until recently, I was simply "book smart". I never really took the time to learn the lessons I would need to get through life, and I'm a little behind. I guess I could call these the "me lessons" because these two simple, yet important things have completely changed my personality.
Lesson #1: Running away is NEVER the answer.
For as long as I can remember, I've run away from confrontations, from pain. I don't necessarily mean physically running either, I've been known to emotionally shut down for weeks at a time. Now...I respond in a totally different way. I say what I think, and I don't bottle up my emotions anymore. For example, I'm head over heels in love with my best guy friend, and considering there are more than a few issues with our relationship at the moment, I've done quite a bit of running. Everytime I've run away, he's either followed me or not let go. To be honest, I don't even try to go anymore. It still crosses my mind, but being his best friend has made me realize a few things. One, he'll never let me get to far. Two, regardless of where I actually intend to run too, I will inevitably run to him. Three, running away is NEVER the answer. Staying and seeing things through is how it should be. It takes to courage to stand your ground when everything is falling apart around you. I've finally learned that, and I can say it makes my life easier.
Lesson #2: Shutting people out doesn't help.
I've always had lots of friends, but I never truly talked to those friends. I had a very short list of people I trusted enough to let behind my emotional "wall". I believe there were four throughtout my entire senior year. Now, seeing as I don't exactly have a wall anymore, there are way more people inside my head than I am used too. However, there are still things I keep between myself a few people. Thankfully, my very short list is now short, but definitely longer than four. It kind of sucks that it took me several years to learn this, but hey, better now than never. Honestly, I have to thank Sunshine for this one (he absolutely hates it when I call him that, oh well). Without him, I'd definitely still have my shell, and I would absolutely still have my wall. Our late night conversations at work, realizing that he's a great guy, and an even better friend, have definitely helped overall. I'm not saying he's the only one, because he's not. The best guy friend I've ever had has done his fair share of shoving, wedging, knocking over, and blowing up the wall I used to have. Hell, he's the reason that there isn't a wall anymore. I've got to say, I love both of these boys for what they've done for me. Without them, I wouldn't be who I am today.
I'm not the same girl who graduated high school just over a month ago. I've changed, grown up a little more. I owe quite a bit to Luna, Sunshine, and that best guy friend I keep referring too. Without those three people, I'd probably still be that hermit who would spend time with one friend, and no one else. I still devote a large amount of my time to that one friend, but I can now balance her with them. I'd be totally lost without those four. Thank you guys, I can now officially say lessons learned.
Lesson #1: Running away is NEVER the answer.
For as long as I can remember, I've run away from confrontations, from pain. I don't necessarily mean physically running either, I've been known to emotionally shut down for weeks at a time. Now...I respond in a totally different way. I say what I think, and I don't bottle up my emotions anymore. For example, I'm head over heels in love with my best guy friend, and considering there are more than a few issues with our relationship at the moment, I've done quite a bit of running. Everytime I've run away, he's either followed me or not let go. To be honest, I don't even try to go anymore. It still crosses my mind, but being his best friend has made me realize a few things. One, he'll never let me get to far. Two, regardless of where I actually intend to run too, I will inevitably run to him. Three, running away is NEVER the answer. Staying and seeing things through is how it should be. It takes to courage to stand your ground when everything is falling apart around you. I've finally learned that, and I can say it makes my life easier.
Lesson #2: Shutting people out doesn't help.
I've always had lots of friends, but I never truly talked to those friends. I had a very short list of people I trusted enough to let behind my emotional "wall". I believe there were four throughtout my entire senior year. Now, seeing as I don't exactly have a wall anymore, there are way more people inside my head than I am used too. However, there are still things I keep between myself a few people. Thankfully, my very short list is now short, but definitely longer than four. It kind of sucks that it took me several years to learn this, but hey, better now than never. Honestly, I have to thank Sunshine for this one (he absolutely hates it when I call him that, oh well). Without him, I'd definitely still have my shell, and I would absolutely still have my wall. Our late night conversations at work, realizing that he's a great guy, and an even better friend, have definitely helped overall. I'm not saying he's the only one, because he's not. The best guy friend I've ever had has done his fair share of shoving, wedging, knocking over, and blowing up the wall I used to have. Hell, he's the reason that there isn't a wall anymore. I've got to say, I love both of these boys for what they've done for me. Without them, I wouldn't be who I am today.
I'm not the same girl who graduated high school just over a month ago. I've changed, grown up a little more. I owe quite a bit to Luna, Sunshine, and that best guy friend I keep referring too. Without those three people, I'd probably still be that hermit who would spend time with one friend, and no one else. I still devote a large amount of my time to that one friend, but I can now balance her with them. I'd be totally lost without those four. Thank you guys, I can now officially say lessons learned.
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